For better and worse!

What has happened to the institution of marriage? Call me old fashioned, call me narrow minded, call me whatever you like, but why is it that people can't stay married these days? I come from a broken home and have always had quite a cynical outlook on marriage. However, having been married for 14 years I've realised that you can stay married.

I'm definitely not bragging and am the first to tell anyone that marriage is definitely not a bed of roses, but it is doable! More than that, it is also enjoyable. Once you stop thinking about yourself and rather focus on others, it becomes workable. I suppose it's because we live in an instant society, where everyone wants instant results and satisfaction and are all wrapped up in their own selfish desires. Why else don't they stay married? Why else are they involved with the guy/gal from the office next door, yet they are married. It's obviously easier to get the instant satisfaction being sought from a third party, than to go home and try and work out each others needs with your spouse.

I also feel especially sad when there are kids involved. Children will always live with the effects of divorce, no matter how young they were when it happened or how much counselling they receive. It's true that children are survivors, but ask me and I'll be the first to tell you the ramifications of growing up in a single parent home. Again it all boils down to selfishness!

Why is it that people always think the grass is greener on the other side anyway? It never is! Rather the devil you know than the one you don't, I say. It takes years to understand each other in a marriage, years to figure out you won't be able to change your partner and years to work out all the conflicting issues. Someone once told Wayne and I that the first 20 years of marriage are the worst and I tend to agree. I'm sure by that time, you've worked through all the issues and you can really enjoy just being with other. If you keep flitting from one to another, how on earth will you ever reach that satisfaction? Marriage is hard, no one ever said it wasn't, however, it is possible and worth hanging in for.

Then you have the folk who just get married because it's the next logical step in the relationship. For goodness sake, what happened to love and value's? Next thing you hear they are divorced after a couple of months and they both claim that they have already moved on. Moved on where, to the next unsuspecting partner?

Families form the basis of our world, that is the way God intended it and at the rate we are going, breaking up the family unit is only going to lead to more heartache and plenty of unfulfilled lives.